Teenage Fairytale Love
2003-09-18 @ 8:24 p.m.

Gasping and grabbing at the air in front of me, I can't breathe, and I'm choking on my own sobs.

One tear, two tears, three tears, four, five, six, countless numbers of them falling onto my crossed arms.

...and I'm gasping for air.

I did this to myself, you know. I brought this on myself. I'm crying for him. What a mediocrity, it seems, what a mediocrity I seem. I'm crying over some faceless guy, some guy I haven't spoken to.

I'm crying for Prince Charming.

I've seen you here and there, I've seen the way you carry yourself, the way you move, and I'm loving every minute of you.

I'm hoping for a minute with you, but I'm too shy. Too fucking shy.

So I stay away, far away...

...and I'm gasping for air.

Now you have it in for my friend, you fucker, but I only have myself to blame. I'm angry with you, but I'm loving you, but I haven't even met you, but I'm hoping to meet you, but I'm doubting you'd want to, and I'm doubting I'd want to, 'cause I'm just so fucking shy.

...but I'm doubting, and doubt keeps me back.

I've never been the kind of girl you'd think of as pretty, and I've never been the kind of girl to catch your eye. I don't stand out, I'm as faceless as you, my prince.

I'm as faceless as you.

...and now I'm hating myself for this, crying for some guy I don't even know. You're the first I've ever cried over, the first guy I've ever cried over, and I feel stupid.

You're making me feel stupid.

Stereotypical teen girl, I think to myself, boy-crazy and high on puppy love.

I'm drunk on the sights of you, my pretty junkie.

Take another drag of that cigarette, 'cause I love to watch you rebel, my prince, stereotypical teengage boy of mine.

So I'll cry for you today, maybe tomorrow, and the next day, and the next tomorrow.

I'm crying for some boy I don't know, 'cause I've claimed ownership of him.

I saw him first.

You're mine, my prince, Mister Rebel, petty junkie, and I'll cry for you, 'cause I like to feel stupid sometimes.

I like it when you make me feel stupid.


Listening to: "My Sweet Prince" by Placebo

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The Weather Underground - 2008-11-12
- - 2008-05-06
She knows I can read. - 2008-05-06
William Jacobson - 2008-05-02
Lost Boys - 2008-04-30

everything © Claudia (2003-2008)